My first sexual fantasy

There has been far too much wedding navel gazing lately. I was tempted to write some more, re. a sudden spate of friend kissing that I think might be marriage-related, but really, I’m bored of myself now, so everyone else must be even more fed up.

Instead here’s something silly:

I started fantasising when I was about 14 (the same time my periods became regular – hormonal association?), and can remember my first fantasy very clearly.

In it I was naked and tied spread-eagled to a big, cold, stone block. A faceless guy in a long black coat, leather gloves and a surgeon’s mask loomed over me in a menacing fashion…

And that’s it.

That was enough to make my 14-year-old self come. I had a vague idea that the man was about to do painful things to me, but at that stage I didn’t have the imagination to furnish any details, but I simply didn’t need them – the expectation was enough.

I’ve always been comfortable with my fantasies being kinky or gay (or kinky and gay), but there is one aspect of that first little vignette I’m quite embarrassed to recall – the reference material.

Would make a lovely rug

The big stone block was inspired by The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe – the part when Aslan is sacrificed by the White Witch. And the black-coated faceless man was inspired by *cough, mumble* Herr Flick from ‘Allo ‘Allo!

What was I thinking?

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1 Comment»

  Grill wrote @

Genius! The workings o’ the human mind, etc.


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