36% of my waking life

New job… hum.

I wrote the post below last Thursday, and I’m now feeling way better about the situation. The simple act of putting my thoughts on paper helped me see things more calmly, as did talking it through with J.

He pointed out that this is the first time I’ve NOT gone into a company as the bright young thing, so proving myself is gonna feel harder but should be a good process to go through.

Plus, I finally have some work to do; not much and not very engaging, but it’s at least a chance to get to grips with standard operating procedures.

The main issues:

I’m bored!!! I’m frustrated!!!

Bored because there is very little work to do. Frustrated because when work comes in, it seems pretty unlikely that any of it will be creative. The way the company is structured, I’m not sure creative work would even come my way; I think it might be cross-charged to the guys downstairs.

I did a lot of promo work in my last job – sales aids, websites, conference stands – but that was the boring bit. The fun bit was working on new concepts, and I did a reasonable amount of that too. I never did any med ed (the really, really boring stuff where you write monographs and key opinion leader slides).

But I’m worried that here med ed is gonna be the bread and butter, and the promo work is gonna be *sigh* the fun bit.

I’m trying to be grown-up about this. I know that sulking because the job isn’t what I expected isn’t going to help me, and it certainly isn’t going to encourage anyone here to help me. Complaining about what I don’t have is the perfect way to miss what’s under my nose, and I think this job could offer some great experience, just nowt creative.

I need to be proactive and create a system I’m happy to work within, but I’m not very good at that. Plus the junior writer, who joined two months ago from uni, is awesome at everything. This is great for the company, and she’s a lovely person, but it’s making me feel threatened.

The fact that she is so young, already so good at her job, and so freakin’ smart makes me feel like a charlatan. Like maybe I’ve been lucky so far, but next to her it’ll be obvious that I’m not that great.

So, positive, sanity-affirming plan of action:

Stay open-minded
Throw myself into stuff
Be proactive
Be humble
Let people teach me
Look for/create projects that involve concept work
Reassess portfolio in six months’ time

If I haven’t done any work I’m proud of by then, or alternatively grown into a position where doing creative isn’t so important, it’ll be time to hit the classifieds


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