Archive for July, 2013

“I thought it was a game”

Subspace – the place a bottom’s head goes to when a top pushes their buttons, or rather their limits, in the right way. I suspect it feels different for each person each time, like an acid trip or a live song. Some people fall down a bottomless rabbit hole, others report out-of-body experiences or hyper-real hallucinations.

My trips into subspace take the form of a meditative absence. I simply stop thinking, stop being, beyond the sensations I’m experiencing. It takes a while afterwards to come back to Earth, to reconnect with myself as the woman in the scene.

The headspace, coupled with all the gorgeous neurotransmitters that flood the brain in response to pain, is incredibly cathartic and energizing. Trite I know, but leaving the world for a while is a wonderful way to appreciate living upon it.

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Full disclosure: I had an out-of-body experience once, when someone fisted me while I was high on a cocktail of recreational drugs. I rose straight up from the bed along a matrixey Tron-like tunnel, and at the top there was the huge disembodied head of an old Chinese guy, smiling beatifically at me. I think the moral of this story is, for safety and sanity, stick to vanilla sex when you’re high.

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